Month: March 2023

When a parent or family member requires care that is beyond your capability to provide, what do you do? Bringing in a professional caregiver for your parent so they can continue living at home may seem like the obvious choice. In this article, we will share the benefits and limitations of home health care. We will also address this question: What are some other options if in-home care might not be right for your mom or dad?

In-home care for aging parents, defined

In-home care is a large, growing, well-established practice that’s designed for people who’d like to continue living in their home but need regular care. Some families hire professional caregivers to provide companionship for their parent when they can’t be there. More typically, the person needs someone to look after them while providing personal care services. If your parent lives with you ­– or you’ve moved into your parent’s house – bringing in a competent, caring home health professional might help your parent while relieving you of caregiver responsibilities.

Does your parent need in-home care?

When you arrange for in-home care services, the provider will perform an assessment based on your parent’s activities of daily living, or ADLs.

Here are the six essential activities of daily living, which may reveal your parent’s ability to look after themselves:

• Ambulating: Ability to move and walk on one’s own
• Personal hygiene: Bathing and other aspects of grooming
• Continence: Controlling bladder and bowel functions
• Dressing: Selecting and putting on clothing
• Feeding: Eating on one’s own
• Toileting: Using the toilet and cleaning oneself

Another key measurement is instrumental activities of daily living, or IADLs.

Here are the six IADL factors that make it possible for someone to live independently:

• Competent management of personal finances
• Obtaining and taking prescription medications as directed
• Communicating successfully using phone and mail
• Shopping for necessities including food and clothing
• Cleaning the house and kitchen
• Ability to prepare meals

Using these assessments will help determine the level of in-home care your parent will need.

Quiz: Does your parent need home care?

In-home care’s pros and cons

Once you have a clear idea of what sort of in-home care your parent requires, it’s time to determine the benefits and drawbacks of these services.

Pros

Living at home
In-home care makes it possible for your parent to continue living safely at home

Personalized care
Your parent is cared for one-on-one – with services customized to fit his or her likes and needs

Caregiver selection
You and your family select and approve the caregiver who will work with your parent

Caregiver familiarity
Mom or Dad becomes acquainted with the caregiver, which may increase their comfort with the arrangement and reduce loneliness and isolation

Customized costs
Costs are based on the services delivered, so you won’t pay for anything your parent doesn’t need

Cons

Accelerating costs
The more care that’s needed, the higher the cost will be; in the U.S., the average cost for round-the-clock in-home care is $2,800 per week (the actual price is driven by a variety of factors, including where you live)

Varied quality
Should your parent require 24/7 care, multiple caregivers may handle tasks, and the quality of care might not be the same between one caregiver and another

Care management
When you hire an in-home caregiver, you and the family become the caregiver’s “management team,” which increases the odds of bringing on the right caregiver by asking the right questions

Home modifications
Even with in-home care, the home may need modifications to make it safe for older adults – this might include everything from grab bars to wheelchair ramps to modifying the width of bathroom doors

Limited services
The in-home care agency may not provide services such as grocery shopping or cleaning the house – and you will still need to manage or outsource home maintenance like cleaning the gutters and shoveling snow

If the pros outnumber the cons, you might be on your way to a great solution for your parent that will keep them right where they want to be – in their own home. However, if any of the downsides above give you pause – or if you discover that the cost will be higher than expected – an assisted living community might make more sense.

What is assisted living, and will it benefit your parent?

Despite the fact that more than 900,000 people live in assisted living communities across the U.S., the general public is often unclear on what assisted living is and how it differs from other senior living options.

“Senior living” is an umbrella term covering 55+ neighborhoods that include apartments, condos or townhomes – along with planned communities where room, board and care are included in a single monthly fee.

Assisted living offers around-the-clock attention for each resident’s personal needs, be it managing their medications or helping them get dressed and bathe. Many assisted living communities have full-time licensed nurses on staff, and some communities have a nurse on-site 24/7.

What if your parent is experiencing cognitive decline?

If your parent has Alzheimer’s or another type of dementia, consider the advantages of a memory care community. Similar to assisted living (in fact, memory care is often offered within assisted living communities), memory care provides security and safety in a private area dedicated to supporting the unique needs of people with cognitive impairment.

How does assisted living differ from nursing homes?

Just to be clear: Assisted living and memory care are not the same as nursing homes. Nursing home residents require more care than what is typically offered at an assisted living community, such as palliative care. Nursing homes have a clinical setting that is closer to a hospital or rehab center and usually don’t provide the social and wellness opportunities you’ll find at an assisted living community.

Pros and cons of assisted living communities

Pros

Lower costs
Assisted living might cost less than an in-home option if around-the-clock care is needed

Adjustable care and costs
The amount of care – and therefore, the cost – can be raised or lowered as needed

Improved family dynamics
Since the family isn’t managing the care and home maintenance, they can concentrate on spending quality time with Mom or Dad

Socially stimulating
Your parent will have daily opportunities to socialize and form new friendships with other assisted living residents

Expert-led nutrition services
In some communities, menus crafted by a culinary team trained in senior nutrition offer varied and healthy meal options

Programs designed for older adults
Some communities offer programs designed to engage older adults and encourage them to pursue their interests

Cons

Moving challenges
Your parent might be leaving a home they love, and they’d likely need to part with some personal belongings in a move to assisted living

Potential extra costs
Should a very high level of personal attention be needed, you might need to hire a private duty aide; this will cost extra

Shared common spaces
While many residents thrive in an assisted living community, some people shy away from group environments

Making a fully informed decision

When comparing in-home care options, always have a licensed home health care agency do a thorough assessment of your parent’s needs. If you’d like to learn more about assisted living, this blog has some useful information. Also, feel free to reach out to your local Atria community director today for resources and support.

Many older people enjoy life independently for many years without incident –and then, one day, something happens. Your parent slips and falls. They become ill and can’t care for themselves. The normal tasks of daily living become too much to handle. Occasional forgetfulness turns into a noticeable cognitive decline. You may wonder if it’s safe for Mom or Dad to continue living on their own.

Is moving in with your parent – or having them move in with you – the right move? There can be advantages when a parent moves in. It will give the family a chance to enjoy each other’s company. If Mom or Dad is active and has the energy, they can help around the house, babysit the kids and maybe even contribute financially. Moving elderly parents in typically costs less than relocating them to a senior living community.

On the other hand, there is a different set of costs to look at. You might have less privacy, more inconvenience and a disruption to the daily rhythm of your household.

Ask yourself these questions before committing to moving your parent out of their home and into yours.

Checklist: Preparing for Your Parent to Move In 

1. How much personal care will be required?

Take time to think about the types of care – and the level of expertise – that your parent requires. To do this, consider how your mom or dad is doing physically, mentally and emotionally. Are they able to manage the basic activities of daily living? This includes things a healthy adult takes for granted, such as bathing or showering, getting dressed and using the toilet. What will happen when your parent’s health changes in the future? Make plans for it now. If being your parent’s primary caregiver makes you anxious, but you still feel you “must,” that could be a sign that guilt is driving the conversation in your head. Think about how much you’re able and willing to take on.

2. Is my home set up properly for an elderly resident?

Imagine you are your parent walking up to your house. Are there stairs to navigate by the front door? If it’s a multistory residence, can Mom or Dad stay in a bedroom with a bathroom on the first floor? If they use a walker or wheelchair, is the bathroom door wide enough for access? Will your home need to be retrofitted with things like grab bars in the bathroom? Can you eliminate any tripping hazards or other safety issues? In other words, can you realistically make your house “elderly friendly?”

3. What is my relationship with my parent like?

There’s a difference between loving your parent dearly and being able to live with them successfully. Do a reality check on how well the two of you get along. If you like to be around each other and know how to work through problems, then you might make a great match. However, if you’ve always butted heads, living with each other will most likely lead to the same sort of conflicts – or worse.

One more consideration: The physical and emotional effects of aging can create changes in your parent’s mood or behavior. Conditions like dementia tend to intensify over time. So, even if you are getting along now, what will happen should a decline in cognitive abilities lead to a change in personality? This is not pleasant to think about – but it’s important to consider what life might look like in the coming months or years

4. How much time do I have to look after my parent?

If you work full time but have other family members in the home, can you tag team care, so your parent has someone on call? Do you have some flexibility with your job to adjust your schedule as needed? Do you have any childcare duties that might conflict with looking after an elderly parent?

5. Is my family ready for this?

Unless you live alone – which we will cover next – you will need to make sure your significant other and/or children are on board with your parent moving in. Depending on how healthy your parent is, and what their personality is like, having them live with you might be a blessing – or something less than that. Think about the needs of everyone in your household. Who might get less of your time and attention now that Mom or Dad is living under your roof? Will the kids need to step up and do more chores? Do you and your spouse enjoy privacy? Schedule a family discussion and make sure everyone is prepared.

6. I live alone – what do I need to be mindful of?

If your parent is relatively healthy and can look after themselves for extended periods, having them at home might work well. On the other hand, if they have a chronic illness, are coping with dementia or are stressed by the chores of day-to-day life, this arrangement can only work if you have an extended, dedicated caregiving team. That might include friends or relatives who live nearby and have the time. Maybe there’s a retired neighbor on your block who can check in on your parent regularly. There may also be options in your area for professional in-home care. Think this all through and make an honest assessment of whether this will work before committing to the move.

7. Am I prepared to be a successful caregiver?

If you are retired or are a homemaker, you might have the time to be your parent’s caregiver. However, having the time doesn’t mean you have the energy, stamina and determination to be a successful caregiver – especially if it’s a full-time job. To succeed, you will need to make sure your parent consumes a healthy, nutritious diet, guide them toward mentally stimulating activities like book clubs, hobbies and other creative endeavors, and schedule time for regular visits with family and friends.

The phrase, “it takes a village” applies to the role of caregiving. Sooner or later, those who attempt to go solo usually wind up with a chronic case of caregiver burnout.

8. How much will it cost – and who will pay for it?

When your parent moves in with you rather than relocating to a senior living community, it could save some money. There will still be new expenses, however. At the low-end, that includes things like food and utilities. If your parent is dealing with chronic health problems, the costs may begin to soar. It’s important to figure out what the expenses might be, and how they will be paid.

Some families charge their parent room and board. If there are additional care costs – such as retrofitting your house or hiring in-home caregivers – who will pay for them? It’s critical to make these decisions before the move happens.

9. What if I live in another state?

You may be wondering if Mom or Dad should leave their community to come live with you. Or you’re thinking, “Should I move closer to my aging parent?” If your parent is moving in with you from another city or state, they will likely lose their social network and may no longer see their friends regularly. That means it’s very important to help your parent stay connected or form new friendships to reduce the chances of becoming lonely and isolated.

If you have a small family or if everyone is busy, look into the availability of a senior center or adult daycare in your neighborhood. You will need to find a replacement for your parent’s previous social life.

10. Will I need to find new healthcare providers?

If your parent is relocating from out of the area, they will require a new primary care doctor and other healthcare professionals. Helping your parent stay as healthy as possible and providing them with the resources to manage ongoing health conditions are key to a successful move into your house.

11. Can I live with my parent and still have a life?

If you work full time or have a busy, active life, don’t underestimate the time involved to look after an elderly adult in your home. If your parent is relatively healthy and active, they might do fine on their own most of the time. This includes setting medical appointments, making transportation arrangements, ordering prescriptions and other supplies, and more. If not, these tasks will fall to you. You must still make time to look after your own welfare. Don’t just schedule an appointment at the doctor for Mom – arrange some self-care for yourself, too. Educate yourself about the ins and outs of caregiving by taking a class or joining a support group.

Why a senior living community might be a great fit for your parent

Now that you’ve considered what it will take for your parent to move into your home – or for you to move into theirs – you might conclude that you are ready to take the plunge. Or, you could be feeling like it’s too much to handle. Fortunately, there are many alternatives to having Mom or Dad live with you – some of which might be close to home. So next, let’s navigate the landscape of senior living communities.

8 reasons senior living might be the best choice for your parent

1. Assisted living communities offer services and amenities that are difficult to replicate at home

These communities typically provide healthy meals, planned events and programs, opportunities for socializing, and comfortable living spaces – all in a safe, tight-knit, self-contained environment. This attractive combination of features isn’t easily replicated at home.

2. Assisted living communities provide professional caregiving

Many assisted living neighborhoods capably manage challenging situations including chronic illnesses and limited mobility. Dedicated caregivers help with the daily activities of life, from bathing, toileting and getting dressed to medication management and more.

3. All-inclusive pricing makes budgeting easy

Assisted living can simplify life for you and your parent because the monthly rental rate includes their apartment, food, utilities, on-site events and programs, and housekeeping. Some communities may include care services in the rental rate, too.

4. Social connection is part of the design

If you are concerned that your parent will lack a social life, the right assisted living community typically maintains a calendar of events featuring group outings and activities such as movie nights and game nights, along with common areas where residents can sit, relax and talk.

5. Support and amenities create more time to enjoy life

Let’s face it: Many older adults are tired of daily tasks like housekeeping, cooking and home maintenance. That’s part of the “assisted” in assisted living. An on-site staff takes care of these things so residents can focus on enjoying life.

6. Apartments are designed for older adults

Assisted living communities often offer a selection of private or shared apartments designed to meet each resident’s personal preferences and budget.

7. Senior living communities support family relations

With the stress and challenges of caregiving taken off your plate, family dynamics shift. You can instead enjoy time with your parent, rather than letting their meals, appointments and overall well-being consume you.

8. Memory care communities support those with cognitive impairments

If your parent has challenges due to Alzheimer’s or another form of dementia, they might do well in a memory care community. In some cases, assisted living communities offer memory care in a separate, secure neighborhood, while some communities provide memory care only. Memory care services focus on safety and security, with staff on-site 24/7 to provide assistance and support as needed.

Some communities tailor their approach to memory care with thoughtful community design and a staff trained to anticipate the needs of each resident. You may also find programs with a strong emphasis on cognitive stimulation.

While moving your parent out of their home can be a challenge, it can also open the door to a better, richer life. So, take the time to think deeply about the move. If you are finding the process to be difficult or overwhelming, know that the feeling is normal. Stay open to all possibilities and you will find the best living arrangement for your parent.